zuiyo part 2: secondary zuiyo jottings featuring professor hoga and countless more beloved characters

the sphere creature rose from the earth. It was a sphere, with sharp teeth coming from an inexplicable mouth. No other features protruded from its metallic surface. It emerged in a suburb in the east of Melbourne. Uncaringly, it rolled through puddles and stacks of soggy twigs in the gutter and kerbside. Among the litter of water gum fruits that lay around a small car, there was a house fly dozing. The sphere creature coldly ate this fly. Next, approaching a house, it rolled through a thin spiderweb. Sensing vibration better than any spider, the sphere creature turned and, with the speed of a machine, leapt in the direction of the web's doomed weaver. The bowling-ball like killer soon rolled again, this time towards the brick wall of the house. Like a gecko it rolled up vertically, reaching the thin barrier of the eaves. Drops of water fell to the ground as it noclipped through into the attic. Here it found a family of mice. Of these confused rodents it consumed one and, with this target captured, rolled forth again. It turned its reddened teeth towards the far end of the house. With webs covering it, and mouse droppings, it rolled and rolled, finally settling on a very specific location of the attic. Then, a glow illuminated everything in red and the ball lowered through the ceiling ectoplasmically, silently ambushing a sleeping cat from above. This medium-sized mammal made a few more sounds than the fly and mouse, and alerted a person in a nearby room that something unusual was happening. Cutting off an urgent writing project, they worriedly stepped out of their room and saw the absence of the dear pet. In its place was a glowing ball with bloodied teeth. The person quickly ran down the hallway, taking their phone from a pocket and opening the 'Services Victoria Sphere Creature Alert App'. They tapped the button that said 'report a current outbreak', but the button disappeared and a popup appeared saying 'Please update the app to keep accessing this service'. With growing panic, the unlucky user tried to download the update but another text box came up, saying 'Couldn't download: not enough space on phone. Manage storage in Settings'. Thankfully, a large meteorite soon fell on top of the sphere creature, saving the day.

Professor Hoga and the 2 trials of cannibal canyon

Professor Hoga lived a normal life. She was 6 years old and already a holder of a phd in archaeo-technology. However, if you talked to her, you would have no idea. In fact, at the age of 5, she developed a rare form of amnesia, and forgot all of her knowledge, and changed personality greatly. No longer a competent scientist, she is just as goofy and unsure of herself as any 6 year old in her class. But she still holds the phd tile, and the name 'professor', and still wears a lab coat.

In Mine City, the usual mines have all dried up and work now carries on in 'cannibal canyon', said to be home to a horrific creature. As nobody wants to mine there voluntarily, every primary school is required to send two students there every year to gather the neccesary resources for the survival of the colony. Hoga is selected, along with fellow student Scuba. Hoga is selected for her academic achievements, even though she does not have those memories any more. She is faced with a terrible task.

Leading up to the grand day, she finds a box of tapes where her former self kept a diary of notes and discoveries, all addressed to her future self. From these she learns a lot about the mine, about archaeo-technology, and about herself...

Along with Suba, Hoga descends the mineshaft. Using the formulae for ultra fast drying concrete and for ultra stone dissolving solution her former self gave her, she makes speedy advances in the industrial cave, gathering countless minerals and making the layout of the firs tfew regiosn much safer and more navigable for future miners. However, on eday, while mixing up a big bucket of concrete, Hoga loses track of Scuba, who falls into a machine and is killed. In grief, Hoga buries Scuba and has a dark night of the soul.

She listens again to the tapes of her mentor, her former self, the true professor Hoga. But the next day, she comes across a strange concrete building in the depths of the machinery-- and the lights are on. Stepping inside, a tall scientist greets her... introducing herself as professor Hoga. It is revealed that young Hoga was actually never a professor, but her parents lied to her when their older daughter was exiled, in order to rewrite history and reduce the trauma. Protagonist-Hoga has another dark night of the soul, believing she is no true scientist, just a phony... But then original-Hoga is injured in a landslide, and protag-Hoga helps her by dissolving away the rock with the acid.

Next, the legendary creature arrives, and Hoga A and B can either attack it or befriend it. Old Hoga, who has been hunting for the creature for years, immediately attacks it and falls into an abyss. But New Hoga, who has always been known for her way with animals (a trait that suspiciously only appeared after her 'amnesia',) realises it can be befriended, and befriends it. Riding on its back, she flies down the abyss to save old Hoga.

Two the Hogae, both exiled, maintain a lively research centre in the cannibal cave, and make brand new discoveries in archaeo-technology together, as partners.

Hoga 2: the lake

It was a peaceful weekend on Fishbucket lake. No moral dilemmas or supernatural occurences had taken place for hours. Professor Hoga, after a week of frantic research, was catching fish, and no other boats were in the lake.

One fish, two fish... Countless fish were hooked, pulled up, and splashed into the grand bucket for Hoga's experiments. No fish said a word, until one carp spoke up.

'I am duke Cheesechild of the Carpian Fish Dynasty. You will regret this...'

Prof Hoga adjusted her glasses and peered into the bucket with only mild surprise.

'But you look just like the other carp here...'

'I was the only carp gifted with the gift of speech. The Heavenly Carp of Power (who created the earth, and this lake, and created carp in his image) bestowed this gift of human speech onto me to protect the interests of his children on earth'

'that's really interesting'

'So unhand my brethren! Carp are the lords of earth; to slaughter them is to make an enmy of the Great Creator.'

'I only need a few carp for a scientific experiment. But anyway, so many people have fished for carp for thousands of years. Even goldfish are carp. It sounds like this deity of yours has left you with a raw deal. It doesnt seem like he cares much about you'

'Silence! We do not question the ways of the Great Mind. Filthy air breather! I have a great weapon. The Carp God gave me not only human speech, but acoustic powers beyond any imagination. I can make a sound so high-pitched that your ribcage would instantaneously shatter. But I will take my lessons from the Great One and show mercy. If you agree to let me and my carp friends go, I will abstain from the use of that weapon...'

Hoga thought for a moment. It's possible this fish is simply bluffing. But I don't think it is worth risking my life just for a little project like this.

'Ok, carp. You win,' she said, pouring the bucket of carp back into Fishbucket Lake.

'Thank you, professor Hoga. The Lord will reward you in the afterlife'

Hoga sighed, and rowed away to the shore while looking at the moon. Without any carp, her reserach project, titled 'Carparadise: A proposal for granting immortality and eternal beatidue to the Common Carp (Cyprinus carpio) using scientific and hydroponic methodologies' was unlikely ever to get off the ground.